One of my most memorable high school teachers was my United States history teacher, a rock-ribbed conservative. He lived near the school and every day, as we arrived for class, we could see two flags flying in front of his house --- an American flag and one from The Citadel, the military academy in South Carolina that he attended as a boy. He also painted the rocks in front of his house red, white and blue.
His homeroom was decorated with battle scenes and model warplanes and he was rumored to carry a pistol. I'm sure the PTA, the school's insurance carrier and the teacher's union would blow several different kinds of gaskets about that now, but in those pre-Columbine days we kids viewed it as rebellious and quirky, not frightening.
My point, and I do have one, is that he was not exactly a flaming liberal.
Obviously, he had a pretty strong sense of right and wrong, and a strong sense of duty to country. But he also had a strong sense of civic responsibility and our duty to take care of society, and our neighbors. He'd frequently ask a student their opinion on some societal problem, and woe betide those who gave some namby-pamby answer, or worse, said something selfish.
Then he'd snort derisively and point a piece of chalk at the class. "That's the problem with this generation," he'd say. "It's all 'hooray for me, and to hell with you! I've got mine!' Nobody cares about the other guy."
He passed away several years ago. Yet I've often found myself thinking about him recently, and wondering what he'd make of the current Republican Party. I think he'd be solidly in their corner on moral issues, but I have a strong feeling the rest of their platform would drive him crazy. Especially this whole Social Security debate.
There seems to be a real nihilistic streak in the national Republican leadership. The whole idea that someone, somewhere, might be getting something they didn't pay for just seems to drive them buggy. They have strained mightily to convince the public that there is some terrible crisis coming in Social Security, only to have others point out that, no, the system is solvent for at least the next 40 years.
So they switched gears. Social Security was going to add $3.5 trillion to the national debt, they crowed --- only to fall silent when several critics pointed out that the President's privatization plan would add $4.5 trillion to the national debt.
Now, they're back to their old standby: "It's your money. Why shouldn't you keep your money? Who is the government to maintain a retirement fund for you?"
(As illustrated in Tuesday's Almanac, the very people pushing this privatization plan the hardest have lavish government retirement funds waiting for them.)
The very idea of Social Security just burns them up, I think. It's not about any possible deficit 20 or 40 or 100 years from now. They just don't want government paying money to anyone, because it bugs them.
So maybe the real Republican Party argument against Social Security ought to be my teacher's famous saying: "Hooray for me, and the hell with you! I've got mine!"
They've got theirs. Who cares if you get anything?
And why should the government make sure people have "social security"?
You know, that's funny, because it brings me back to my teacher. He grew up during the Depression. And used to tell us stories of having to eat fried dough for dinner because his family was on what was then called "relief."
See, there was no welfare system. If you lost your job, or your primary wage-earner died or became ill, you were out of luck, and dependent on charity. Maybe, if you were fortunate, your town would take up a collection and give the poor a sack of flour to make fried dough. Often, people who went on "relief" had to grovel and humiliate themselves before they'd qualify for a handout.
As for retirement, you worked until you got too old or ill, and then you moved in with your family. If you didn't have a family, you lived on the street, or in a shanty town somewhere, until you died.
When the economy was roaring along in the 1920s, things were OK, because most people could find work doing something. But when the crash came, American society ground to a halt. The country was flirting dangerously with Communism and socialism when the Roosevelt administration came along with radical ideas like unemployment compensation, welfare, disability insurance and Social Security. They didn't end the Depression, but they stitched together the national fabric just long enough to keep the country from collapse.
Franklin Roosevelt had this novel idea that forcing large numbers of people to go out and pick garbage or beg for charity handouts was bad, because eventually, it was going to cause American society to break down. So despite the fact that FDR very much had his, he didn't say to hell with the rest of America.
I'm not sure that certain elements in the national Republican Party really care that much about "society." They talk a lot about "moral values," but the idea of working toward the collective, common good of their fellow man just escapes them. They've got theirs. Hooray for them!
The worrisome thing is that they've implanted this selfishness into the national consciousness. If my teacher were alive today, he'd practically be a pinko. Just the other day, there was a letter to the editor of the Post-Gazette from a fellow in Hampton Township complaining about public transportation. Why, the letter writer demanded to know, should he be taxed to pay for buses? After all, he doesn't ride buses.
I suppose it never occurred to him that the people who work in the stores or restaurants that he frequents might rely on buses to get to those jobs. Some of them might even be former welfare recipients who were told to get off the dole, and go get jobs. (I happen to agree with "welfare-to-work," by the way.) But now that they've got jobs, maybe we can take their transportation to those jobs away.
Hooray for the letter writer, and to hell with the people who ride the buses! He's got his!
I'm not sure what it's going to take to smarten some people up. I just hope like hell it isn't another Depression.
Because I like eating fried dough at a carnival or fair, but I'm not sure I'd like it for dinner.
The lingering aftereffects of the flu are still wreaking havoc with the few brain cells that I have left in operation, and the well is dry.
I did think "Something Awful"'s review of that classic film "Dracula 3000" was funny, however:
Overview: Next time you want to stump a movie buff, ask this question: "What was the worst movie released in 2004 about a man named Van Helsing who fights vampires?" If he says "Van Helsing", he may be right, because that movie reeked. But "Dracula 3000" is pretty bad too.
Directed By: Darrell Roodt, 2004.
The Case For: Recommended for obsessive fans who absolutely must own every single movie which stars Casper Van Dien / Erika Eleniak / Coolio.
The Case Against: No such people exist.
There's more --- much, much more --- at "Something Awful."
I keep hearing about the President's plan to "fix" Social Security. Why do I suspect that he wants to "fix" it the same way my friend just had her cat "fixed"?
That cat still seems a little wobbly, and I am, too, when I hear about Social Security "reform."
According to "Retirement Benefits for Members of Congress," a report issued two weeks ago by the Congressional Research Service (an arm of the Library of Congress), the average pension for a retired U.S. Senator or Representative is $55,788 for those elected before 1984 (340 people), or $41,865 for those elected after 1984 (71 people). Here's how the system works:
Members of Congress who were first elected in 1984 or later are covered by the Federal Employees’ Retirement System unless they decline this coverage, in which case they are covered only by Social Security. FERS is comprised of three elements: Social Security; the FERS basic annuity, a monthly pension based on years of service and the average of the 3 highest consecutive years of basic pay; the Thrift Savings Plan (TSP), into which participants can deposit up to 15% of base pay to a maximum of $14,000 in 2005. Their employing agency matches employee contributions up to 5% of pay.
For comparison's sake, the average annual wage in Pennsylvania in 2002 was $35,808, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics --- which is actually well below that for other mid-Atlantic states ($42,793). Nevertheless, the pension for members of Congress is not only well above most people's pensions, it's also more than most working people earn in a year.
And that's a guaranteed pension, of course --- a defined benefit plan, if you will. It's not tied to mutual funds or stocks, which fluctuate over time.
It gets better, of course. What do you think the President's pension will be when he retires?
We go back to the Congressional Research Office, and its Oct. 22, 2004 report entitled "Former Presidents: Federal Pension and Retirement Benefits," which says:
The Former Presidents Act, as amended, provides each former President a taxable pension that is equal to the annual rate of basic pay for the head of an executive department (Executive Level I), currently $175,700. The pension begins immediately upon a President’s departure from office at noon on Inauguration Day, January 20. The Secretary of the Treasury is responsible for making the monthly pension payments, as authorized by the FPA. A presidential widow is provided a $20,000 annual lifetime pension and franking privileges.
Now, what about those massive Social Security checks that all of these deadbeat old people are receiving? You know, the ones who are bankrupting the government, sponging off of the youth of the nation, and driving us into a "crisis"?
According to the Social Security Administration:
Retired workers in Pennsylvania received an average of $920 per month; widows and widowers, $887; disabled workers, $851; and wives and husbands of retired and disabled workers, $469. Average benefits for children were: $470 for children of retired workers; $615 for children of deceased workers; and $242 for children of disabled workers.
To save you the trouble, that means the average retiree in Pennsylvania who didn't have a company-sponsored pension plan is receiving an annual income of $11,040. Widows are receiving $10,644. That's half of what former First Ladies get while their husbands are alive, for comparison's sake.
So, whenever the President tells us that Social Security is in "crisis," keep in mind that paying the widows and widowers of the United States $11,000 a year is driving us to the poor house. It's not those big tax cuts of a few years ago; those are stimulating the economy.
I realize that this wouldn't save very much money, but if the President and all of the members of Congress want me to trust them to "reform" Social Security, wouldn't it be a nice symbolic gesture if they cut their own pensions to $11,000 per year?
And now, if you'll excuse me, I just started laughing so hard, I have to go change my pants.
Eastland Mall has taken a turn for the worse. In fact, it's died.
Not just the flea market, but now everyone --- even Tony the Shoemaker --- is being given the cruel shoe by Benderson Development, according to Saturday's Daily News (the story isn't online). Jeremy Boren also had a story in Sunday's Tribune-Review.
In brief, Eastland's remaining tenants have until Feb. 28 to beat it, or else they'll have it beaten for them, though to be frank, I'm not sure what leverage Benderson has. ("Oh no! You're going to kick me out of Eastland Mall!")
Tony is moving to Great Valley Shopping Center up on Route 30. There's no word where the other remaining tenants --- most notably, the PennDOT driver's license center, District Justice Robert Barner, a beauty parlor, and Beer World --- are going to end up. (You've got your real circle of life there --- the driver's license center, the beauty parlor, the beer distributor and the magistrate's office.)
I'm taking bets when the demolition equipment rolls in (my guess is mid-April) though personally, I'd say one good shove ought to bring the whole thing down. They couldn't burn it down, because it's too waterlogged. I just hope the people up in Crestas are prepared, because if that joint is as vermin-infested as I think it is, the number of pests fleeing that place when it's demolished are going to be truly mindboggling.
I wonder if Benderson would rent the whole shooting match out for one last fling. I was thinking it might be fun to restage the Dixie Square Mall scene from "The Blues Brothers" there.
Alert Reader Tom from Belle Vernon liked my Eastland Mall song:
Very good one ... however you should have included the burnt cheese smell as you entered the east side entrance. I still think of the mall every time my toasted cheese sandwich goes up in smoke.
I had forgotten about the burnt cheese odor. On the other hand, if I had included every smell from Eastland Mall in that song, it would have gone on for another 40 stanzas. Entire epic poems could be written about the odors in that place, if only it wasn't so hard to find a rhyme for "mildew."
In a slightly related matter, Thursday's Almanac --- in which I discussed people who buy an eighth of a pound of lunchmeat --- prompted this recollection from Tom:
I remember back in the early '70s buying lunchmeat at the old Farmer's Pride near the Memorial Theater. There was a crusty old timer there arguing with the lady about the lack of meat on the chicken necks that she was getting for him ... they were 10 cents a pound. The whole store busted out laughing after hearing his rant.
Can we agree that the old guy was ahead of his time? He needed a blog.
In other business, remember a few months ago when Alert Reader Ed wrote in to say that he had found tape of a Mon Valley band called The Oncomers, and I put him in touch with Bill Scully Jr., drummer for The Hi-Frequencies?
No? Well, just trust me on this, OK? Sheesh.
Bill sends along this update:
I just want to thank you again for getting me in touch with Ed Kearney. I visited Ed at his home a few weeks ago, and he let me hear the Oncomers live recording from the Cove Club. Ed's Sony reel-to-reel captured about 2 sets' worth of material that night (including a few R&B hits of the day mixed in with their vocal and instrumental songs). Elements of surf, country/honky tonk, doo-wop, and dance/R&B are all apparent. Most bands today would never dream of covering such a wide mix of music, but dance hall and bar bands in those days were expected to cover the gamut of popular music.
Some of the music is a bit sloppy and out of tune, and even the tightest songs have an off-the-cuff quality to them that is lacking from a lot of bands. This is a very charming recording, a great document.? I wish that more tapes like this would turn up (I know you're out there somewhere!). This tape captures highlights from just another 9 pm to 1 am night at this bar in pre-assassination/pre-Beatles Pittsburgh. I really dig the recording for all of these reasons.
Bill has put Ed in touch with another member of the Oncomers, and they're planning to meet.
I guess the only additional question we can ask is, are there any plans to make excerpts of this tape available to the public? Stay tuned.
You are on an archived page of Tube City Almanac.
Click the banner to return to the front page; or click here to visit Tube City Online.
Published weekdays (usually), except holidays (and when we have something better to do) at McKeesport, Pa., by Tube City Online LLC, P.O. Box 94, McKeesport, Pa. 15134.
Opinions expressed here are those of the individual authors, and do not necessarily represent those of any organization. No warranty is given or implied for the information and opinions contained herein; the reader uses that information at his or her peril.
Except where noted, all contents are copyright © 2003-2008 Tube City Online LLC, a limited-liability company chartered in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania. No content from Tube City Online may be reproduced in whole or part in any digital or print publication without express permission, except that short excerpts may be used with attribution in commentary or for critical purposes.
Tube City Online is edited by Jason Togyer, member National Writers Union, Society of Professional Journalists, American Radio Relay League and National Radio Club.
Also, objects in Tube City Online may be closer than they appear. If Tube City Online is swallowed, seek professional help immediately. Stop use of Tube City Online if condition persists or worsens. Tube City Online is produced in a facility that also includes Peanuts. Do not expose Tube City Online to open flames and keep it out of the reach of children. Do not back up, as severe tire damage may result. Not responsible for lost or stolen articles. Tube City Online is still not a significant source of saturated fats or Minnesota Fats.
