After reading yesterday's Almanac, former colleague and Alert Reader Vince sent along this photo of him meeting former U.S. Rep. Jim Traficant while in elementary school.
"I'm the one in the pink shirt," Vince says. "I have lots and lots of hair!"
Like your Almanac editor, and Jim Traficant, Vince is now somewhat follically challenged, though he's had the courage to shave the rest off. Another former colleague, Dave Copeland, did the same thing, and he looks pretty good.
I keep clinging to the notion that if I only have the rest of my hair cut really, really short, no one will notice that my hairline starts about six inches above my eyebrows.
Also, I fear that if I shave my head, I'll look like a giant thumb.
I don't intend to go the Rudy Giuliani route --- parting my hair at my neck and combing it over. Nor will I emulate Traficant and put a remnant on my head. But I am going to cling to my remaining follicles until the bitter end.
In local news, the former McCrory five-and-10 store on West Main Street in Mon City burned down yesterday morning after apparently being struck by lightning. I lived for about a year directly across the street, above what is now a pizza shop, while I worked for the Observer-Reporter.
Monongahela is a great city, by the way --- one of the undiscovered little gems in the Mon-Yough area. A wonderful waterfront, an honest-to-goodness main street that you can walk, a good little town park with a gazebo. I love living near Our Fair City, in neighboring North Bittyburg, but if I worked south of Picksberg, I could easily see living in Mon City. (Irwin and West Newton would also be high on my list.)
And Mon City, for all of its other charms, also holds a rare distinction: It's one of the few communities I can think of where Fourth Avenue intersects Fourth Street. (You could, as they say, look it up.)
I actually looked at an apartment above the McCrory building, but not for long. The realtor gave me a key and sent me down alone. I opened the outside door to find a pile of moldy mail and spiderwebs covering the stairway to the second floor. I instantly knew I wouldn't moving there, but I decided, for giggles, to continue upstairs and check out the apartment.
The kitchen had last been updated in Franklin Roosevelt's second term and most of the paint had peeled from the walls and ceilings; little chips and flakes littered every horizontal surface. The windows, which offered a lovely view of the railroad tracks, were decorated with about 200 dead bugs in various states of decomposition.
I returned to the real estate office and gave the lady the key.
"It's a nice old building, isn't it?" she said.
"Well," I said, biting my cheek, "it's interesting. It needs a lot of work, though. A lot of work. It needs to be completely cleaned and repainted, for one thing."
"We might be willing to make a deal," she said. "In fact, you seem like a nice guy. I'll bet we could let it go for $300 a month, plus utilities."
I politely declined. But considering what I was being paid at the time by the newspaper, I might have moved there --- if the landlord had paid me $300 a month.
Anyway, I have no idea what the upstairs of the old McCrory building looks like after this massive fire, but based on Scott Beveridge's report in the O-R, I don't think a coat of paint is going to do the trick now.
Maybe some other time, I'll tell you about the apartment that I did end up renting --- the one across the street from McCrory's. Particularly about the night they installed new pizza ovens downstairs and decided to "test them out."
I toured U.S. Steel's Clairton Coke Works a few years ago, and let me tell you, there was less smoke there than in my living room that night.
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To Do This Weekend: Speaking of the Monongahela area, you can see the stars come out at Mingo Creek County Park, Route 88 near Finleyville, when the Amateur Astronomers Association of Pittsburgh hosts "Summerfest" at the new Mingo Creek Park Observatory. Visitors can use the observatory's two giant telescopes, one 24 inches, one 10 inches. Campers will also be setting up additional telescopes nearby to observe the "new moon." And, I suspect, they'll be leading a sing-along of "Rain, Rain Go Away." Many events are planned tonight, tomorrow and Sunday, and food is available. Call (724) 348-6150. ... Closer to home, the McKeesport City Carnival wraps up tomorrow night at Helen Richey Field, Renziehausen Park. Ride all night for $10. Visit the recreation committee's website for details.
I don't often write by name about friends, but forgive me --- this was too good not to share.
When my friend Meghan Holohan (and my new friend, her new hubby, Jarod Boulden) got married, I did something I often do, because I'm sick in the head --- I got them a gag wedding gift.
No, nothing vulgar ... my Victorian-era sense of propriety forbids it. But Meghan, a writer of no mean talent, was fascinated by the downfall of flamboyant Youngstown congressman Jim Traficant, and even tried to interview Jimmy before they sent him up the river. (He never responded. Maybe he was busy combing out his toupees before putting them into storage ... or do you get to wear a rug in the joint?)
Anyway, along with a conventional-type wedding present, I enclosed his 'n hers "Free Traficant" T-shirts.
I always wonder when I do something like that, because some people treat their wedding day as a sacred moment, that must be absolutely, entirely, 100 percent perfect, and no levity of any kind is permitted.
That, happily, is not Meghan and Jarod. Not only did they get a kick out of them ... they wore the T-shirts on their honeymoon to the Bonnaroo art and music festival in Manchester, Tenn., and to some other landmarks in and around Memphis.
Meghan has sent me photos, and with her permission, I'm posting 'em.
Here's Mr. Boulden at Bonnaroo looking decidedly like a Vince Gill fan:
And here he is outside a Beale Street cafe with, inexplicably, a goat used as part of a sculpture:
Finally, here's Mrs. Boulden at the historic Memphis Recording Service, aka "Sun Records," on Union Avenue, where Elvis Presley, Carl Perkins, Jerry Lee Lewis, Roy Orbison, Johnny Cash, and other legends of early rock and roll cut their first sides under the watchful eyes of Sam Phillips. Meghan doesn't quite have the Elvis lip-curl/sneer down pat, but I think she's got the pose OK:
Jarod and Meghan decided not to wear the T-shirts to some other Memphis landmarks, like the National Civil Rights Museum, located at the former Lorraine Motel, where Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was assassinated.
I tend to agree with their decision, though Mr. Traficant's supporters do regard him as a political prisoner of sorts. He is, after all, in jail for allegedly freeing campaign funds from their bondage.
In any event, I'm glad that they were able to spread the word about Mr. Traficant's predicament to the good people of the Volunteer State. I can only hope that he blesses Meghan and Jared with a long and happy marriage.
It was also probably fortunate that they wore those T-shirts on their honeymoon, and not their wedding night.
No offense, but staring at that face would dampen my ... er ... ardor.
Great hoppin' horny-toads, would it kill CSX Railroad to fix the River Road grade crossing under the 15th Avenue Bridge in Port Vue? Motorists heading southbound over that crossing --- which was never the picture of smooth driving anyway --- are getting a nasty surprise.
Apparently the railroad pulled the crossing up to replace either rails or ties or both. Part of the paving in the southbound lane is now missing and is instead packed with ballast --- that's the crushed stone that supports railroad tracks.
But the ballast is getting pushed down below the level of the rails, which means that if you stay in your lane, you get a big jolt --- kapow! --- as your passenger side wheels go over them.
Eventually, I fear someone is going to either rip the undercarriage out of their car, or get hung up on the tracks and be struck by a train. (Besides this clown, I mean.)
That crossing is already a pain in the keister because the gates have a bad habit of malfunctioning and getting stuck in a "fail-safe" position --- one up, one down, lights blinking. I've reported it at least twice myself.
Well, Tube City Almanac decided to take action for you. I've got an email into a spokesman at CSX to find out when the crossing is being fixed, and when (if?) I get an answer, I'll let you know.
And yes, I'm sure an $8.6 billion railroad trembles at the thought of having a mediocre, poorly sourced webpage mad at it!
. . .
P.S.: If you've got a railroad crossing problem, you can also go to the Pennsylvania Public Utility Commission's website and file a complaint.
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The Post-Gazette has a lovely "slideshow" on its website about what it calls "The Jewel of McKeesport" --- no, not the Viking Lounge, the Arboretum (and the rose gardens in particular) in Renziehausen Park. Created in 1938, the Arboretum is maintained by the Garden Club of McKeesport and the Pittsburgh Rose Society.
According to GardenWeb.com, the Renzie Arboretum is considered one of the "great gardens" of Pennsylvania, with more than 1,200 roses arranged in 28 beds, plus three additional raised rose beds of 300 bushes. It's also one of only 130 public rose gardens in the U.S. accredited by a non-profit organization of rose enthusiasts and growers, All-America Rose Selections.
That organization named one of the Rose Society's members, John Consigliero, "Evaluator of the Year" in 2002 for his work on the Arboretum, according to the society's website.
Though you can visit the arboretum any time during daylight hours this summer, I think the Rose Society has a public show and picnic each year around July, but unfortunately, the website hasn't been updated for a while ... you may want to watch the papers for an announcement. (Or maybe some horticulture buff will email this website if he or she knows the details ... hint, hint, hint.)
. . .
Finally, since I bolloxed this up a few weeks ago, I'll try to get it right this time ... the McKeesport City Carnival starts at 6 tonight at Renzie and runs through Saturday. "Ride all night" passes are only $10. Visit the Recreation Committee's website for details.
And the fourth public "lunch on the lawn" of this summer will be held tomorrow starting at 11 a.m. at Kelly Park, located on Walnut Street, Downtown, between Shaw and Sixth avenues.
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