Category: Pointless Digressions, Politics, Rants a.k.a. Commentary || By

Editor's Note: Some days, I live by the precepts of Dorothy Parker, who said, "If you can't say anything nice, come sit next to me."

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He Puts the 'Goober' into Gubernatorial: Gov. Ed Rendell, with all due respect, please stuff a cheesesteak into your gobhole before you say something else that's ridiculous.

Why did anyone think that he was such a skilled politician? After all, he can't seem to get anything through the Pennsylvania General Assembly, with the exception of casino legislation that's been of very dubious quality so far.

Apparently unsatisfied with confining his lackluster record to the confines of the Commonwealth, Rendell never misses an opportunity to say dumb things to national audiences.

Out at the Democratic National Convention, Rendell, who put all of his chips on Hillary Clinton during the Democratic primaries, just can't seem to accept the fact that she lost. Now he's running around, making backhanded remarks about the presumptive nominee, Barack Obama.

First, Rendell blamed the media for Clinton's failure to grab the nomination; at a forum hosted by the Sunday-morning talk shows, Rendell began railing at MSNBC until PBS's Judy Woodruff gently encouraged him to sit down.

Then he told NPR he's "disappointed" that Obama won more delegates than Clinton, because "Hillary Clinton would have been a spectacular president."

Way to sandbag your own candidate, governor. Of course, Rendell did the same thing to Bob Casey Jr. two years ago --- you may recall when he told reporters that "Rick Santorum has proven that he gets the job done ... When it comes to Pennsylvania, Santorum delivers." With friends like these, Democrats don't need enemies.

Maybe Rendell is secretly a Republican; he couldn't be a better advocate for the GOP. Frankly, I don't care if he's a Republican or a Democrat --- I just wish he were a better advocate for Pennsylvania.

We'd be better off if the governor spent just a little time trying to reform the state's antiquated 19th century government, and less time listening to himself talk.

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Sign, Sign, Everywhere a Sign: I like to watch for political signs and bumper stickers; I don't have any proof that their presence or absence can actually be correlated to support of some particular candidate, but I find it interesting.

I've already seen a John McCain sign in a front yard in Liberty Borough, and a McCain bumper sticker on a car in Port Vue.

Liberty has long been a safe place for Republicans in the Mon-Yough area, but Port Vue? Hmm. Interpret this information however you want. It might be meaningless.

Obama signs are so far conspicuous by their absence outside of the McKeesport city limits.

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Sign, Sign, Everywhere a Sign, Part II: Alert Reader Lane wants to know what the signs saying "Save the Police" mean. "Are we talking about Sting? Or just what is going on. Dare I entertain the notion of consolidating redundant services?"

The signs are being posted by Versailles residents who are panicking over the thought that McKeesport police might start patrolling the borough under contract.

Obviously, the 1,700 people who live within Versailles' 0.5 square miles justify the cost and expense of a separate police force, Lane. Bringing in the larger McKeesport police force, which has its own juvenile officer, K-9 team, detective bureau and other services, clearly wouldn't provide any benefits to the residents of Versailles.

It's not important for Versailles taxpayers --- who spend about $257,000 per year on police services out of an $893,480 annual budget --- to save more than $90,000 per year by going with the city.

It's more important for Versailles to retain the "civic pride" that comes from having a police car with "Versailles" painted on the door, because that's really going to keep people from moving away.

I'm glad I could clear up this confusion.

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Home, Sweet Office: Finally, Alert Reader John wants to know if the former G.C. Murphy Co. "home office" might have anything worth preserving.

A few artifacts, like the grandfather clock from the lobby and the brass plaque from the Fifth Avenue entrance, are out at the McKeesport Heritage Center.

But we'll probably never know if anything else is inside. Several years ago, former Murphy PR man Ed Davis asked the current owners of the complex if he could visit the building where he spent much of his career; they cussed him out and hung up on him.

Ed, who does a lot of charity work around town and is one of the Mon Valley's all around "good guys," says he's "never been treated so rudely in my life."

The Murphy home office --- a mishmash of old 19th and early 20th century buildings --- was never much of an architectural treasure, but its current condition is pretty sorry to look at.

It's doubtful much was left behind anyway; most of the fixtures were auctioned off by the late Leo Jesion when Ames sold Murphy's to the McCrory Corp., and I'm told that boxes and boxes of photos and other items were tossed into trash bins.