Tube City Almanac

February 23, 2005

Your Tax Dollars At Something

Category: default || By jt3y

Up in Harrisburg, your state Legislature has been busy, busy, busy.

OK, they didn't find time to arrange funding for mass transit before they took off for a break. (State legislators don't ride buses --- get real!)

Yes, there are still potholes forming in the state highways around the Mon-Yough area that are large enough to form their own townships.

Maybe our school property tax system is as antiquated as a canalboat full of buggy whips.

And sure, our local municipalities are straining under the weight of providing police, fire and public works service.

But you're missing the point. The Pennsylvania General Assembly doesn't have time for that kind of penny-ante nonsense. Our solons are tackling the real issues:

Public schools would be required to start the day with the Pledge of Allegiance or the national anthem under a bill that would revive certain elements of a state law that a federal appeals court overturned last year.


Two of the bill's sponsors, Republican state Sens. Jeffrey Piccola and James Rhoades, said Wednesday they believe the new bill would withstand a legal challenge because it would not require students' parents to be notified if they declined to say the pledge or sing the anthem.


The parental-notification requirement of the law, which was passed and signed in 2002, was cited in a district judge's ruling that declared it unconstitutional in 2003. An appellate court upheld the decision in August.


Of all of the pressing problems confronting the Commonwealth, the shocking lack of patriotism among grammar schoolers is the most important, I think. I keep seeing gangs of elementary-school kids at bus stops sporting Che Guevara T-shirts and anarchist tattoos, don't you? Of course you do!

I'm not sure why, since in the same AP story, a lobbyist for the Pennsylvania School Boards Association says that "only a few" school districts anywhere in the state don't require students to say the pledge.

Nevertheless, before this kind of rampant lawlessness got out of control, legislators swung into action, and they've struck an important blow for ... something. Their own re-elections, most likely. Can you imagine what would happen to any legislator who failed to vote for this law? "Joe Doakes doesn't think kids should say the Pledge of Allegiance. What does he have to hide?"

Nice work, guys! Take another leased car out of petty cash.

Still, Pennsylvania has a long way to go. Our elected officials are a group of pikers when it comes to tackling the important issues that shape our modern world. For real, hot, stimulating legislative action, one must turn to Pennsylvania's sister state, Alabama. The Montgomery, Ala., Advertiser explains:

The U.S. Supreme Court declined Tuesday to review the constitutionality of an Alabama law banning the sale of sex toys, but that doesn't mean products are going to be pulled from Alabama store shelves.


A judge's injunction stopping enforcement of the law remains in effect, and the judge will have to decide whether to leave it in effect until other issues in the case are resolved, said Alabama Attorney General Troy King, who has been defending the law. ...


In 1998, the Alabama Legislature enacted a law that bans only the sale of sex toys, not their possession. Alabama residents may lawfully purchase sex toys out of state for use in Alabama, or use them if the devices have other recognized medical or therapeutic uses.


That's why they have those big signs on the Interstates leading into Alabama: "Sell a vibrator, go to jail. It's the law."

Now, there are those who would say, "When marital aids are outlawed, only outlaws will have marital aids." But I say to these people, "Please wash your hands before touching anything in this room."

Let's review: Enforced patriotism? OK. Sex toys? Not OK.

I feel safer already, don't you?






Your Comments are Welcome!

To comment on any story at Tube City Almanac, email tubecitytiger@gmail.com, send a tweet to www.twitter.com/tubecityonline, visit our Facebook page, or write to Tube City Almanac, P.O. Box 94, McKeesport, PA 15134.