NEWS ITEM: In speeches in Pennsylvania and Ohio Wednesday, President Bush invoked the names of Democrats Franklin Roosevelt, Harry Truman and John Kennedy by way of accusing Kerry of "taking a narrow, defensive view of the war on terror," then summoned memories of Lyndon Johnson and Hubert Humphrey to accuse his rival of shortchanging public education. "If you're a Democrat, and your dreams and goals are not found in the far left wing of the Democrat party. I'd be honored to have your vote." (The Associated Press)
2 - Op. cit, p. 364. (Go back.)A friend who dabbles part-time in broadcasting told me yesterday that he's not listening to any commercial radio until at least next week, because he can't stand the political advertising. Believe it or not, he's put one of those satellite radios in his car, and he's getting a lot of use out of it. (It bodes poorly for the future of free over-the-air radio, if you ask me, when broadcasters start buying satellite radios. But I digress.)
I decided to take a listen to a few commercial stations this morning to see what he was talking about. As best as I could transcribe the commercials (it's hard to type in a moving car), here's what they sounded like. I don't know whether these are the kinds of ads he finds so obnoxious.
...
ANNOUNCER: This ad is not paid for by any candidate or party. It is paid for by the Truth, Justice and American Way Commission, a non-partisan, non-profit organization.
MUSIC: (None.)
SFX: (Busy coffee shop.)
MAN: They say John Kerry's a flip-flopper.
WOMAN: Well, I know one thing he's never flip-flopped on.
MAN: What's that?
WOMAN: Do you know that after 20 years in the Senate, John Kerry has never once voted against cannibalism?
MAN: Really?
WOMAN: That's right. He never voted against it, and he never introduced any legislation to stop cannibalism.
MAN: Wow! Does that mean that John Kerry supports the consumption of human flesh?
WOMAN: To tell you the truth, we just don't know.
MAN: Well, I know who I'm voting for! I'm voting for the man who I know is against cannibalism! President Bush!
WOMAN: You said it! Remember on November Second to vote against cannibalism, and for George W. Bush!
...
ANNOUNCER: Paid for by People United for Motherhood, Apple Pie, Chevrolet and America, Inc., and not authorized by any candidate or party.
MUSIC: (Ominous, with lots of diminished chords)
ANNOUNCER: Before Election Day, ask yourself the following questions. What kind of a man tortures puppies for sport?
What kind of a man stays home at night and becomes sexually aroused by watching slides of car crash and fire victims?
What kind of a man shoots another man in Reno just to watch him bleed?
What kind of a man would tug on Superman's cape? Or spit into the wind? Or pull the mask off of the old Lone Ranger?
Now, ask yourself this: What kind of a man is John Kerry?
On Tuesday, November Second, remember to vote to re-elect President George W. Bush.
...
MUSIC: (A lone trumpet plays stirring patriotic music, while someone in the background beats a tympani drum.)
ANNOUNCER: Since taking office, President Bush has tirelessly worked to keep skunks off of the lawns of America's great monuments to peace, to ensure that school children don't get a face full of stink while they're on field trips.
He has refused to enact crippling taxes on crutches and orthopedic shoes for young people.
He has sent a clear message to our nation's public schools that it's not OK to hire terrorists to teach in our classrooms.
Senator John Kerry? We just don't know where he stands.
On November Second, vote for President George W. Bush. For the sake of our children.
MUSIC: (SWELLS, and then OUT.)
ANNOUNCER: The preceding advertisement was not authorized by any party or political candidate. It was paid for by the Committee of Citizens Who Love Freedom and Hate Evil.
...
All I have to say is, thank goodness for the McCain-Feingold campaign finance reform bill! It sure did put a crimp on all of those negative attack commercials that used to run on radio before an election!
I'm going to call my friend today and ask him two questions. First: Are these the commercials that are leaving him so disgusted?
And also, just how much does one of those satellite radios cost, anyway?
It would stand to reason that the year I'm not able to get a flu shot (along with most of the rest of the U.S.), I would immediately feel like I'm coming down with the flu. Curse you, British pharmaceutical manufacturers and your feelthy laboratories!
I've spent the past two days feeling logy, confused and lethargic, which has left me feeling less than creative. (And what else is new? Nothing.)
Come to think of it, I could be having an allergic reaction to the presidential campaign, but I doubt it. When that happens, I'm more into projectile vomiting and temporary blindness than muscle stiffness and headaches.
...
Rip Rense on Pittsburgh's answer to Martha Mitchell:
Teresa Heinz Kerry, shut up! All three of you! Just shut up! Shut the hell up! Wait till you're First Lady, then you can shoot your Botox-injected mouth off all you want. ...
Lady Teresa --- I dunno, her body language suggests royalty --- loves to yap. She loves to let her tongue flap, and the breeze that emerges is usually entertaining enough. Problem is, the Repugnicans quickly turn it into blowback. ... She might as well just giftwrap her gaffes and send them straight to Karen Hughes and Karl Rove.
The problem ... is that "Ray" is a saccharine movie while Ray himself was anything but a saccharine man. He was a raging bull. Sentimentalizing his story may make box office sense, but, to my mind, it trivializes the compelling complexity of his character. ....
"Ray" is about Ray, and its attempt to define his character. In many ways, the definition is accurate. Foxx brilliantly captures Ray's energy and contradictions. Yet those contradictions are not allowed to stand. The contradictions must be resolved, Ray must live happily ever after. The finale implies that, for all his promiscuity, he is back with Della, the true love of his life, and that, with his heroin habit behind him, it's smooth sailing ahead. The paradoxical strands of his life are tied up into a neat package, honoring the hackneyed biopic formula with a leave-'em-smiling Hollywood ending.
State police arrested a 29-year-old Normalville woman Thursday for allegedly soliciting men in a Yahoo Messenger Internet chat room to come to another woman's home to engage in sex and other activities.
Tracie Lee Grimm was charged with criminal solicitation to commit rape, recklessly endangering another person, identity theft, stalking and two counts of criminal use of a communication facility. ...
Police said Grimm allegedly posed as a 58-year-old Champion woman in the chat room and told the men to come to the victim's Cramer Road residence and rape her when she opened the door. Several males appeared at the victim's residence, but she did not answer the door, police said. The victim also received more than 100 telephone calls from men throughout the United States, police said.
Only a handful of Bush supporters were on hand to protest against Kerry. They were more than countered by a tall woman dressed like the character "Wonder Woman," whose handwritten sign let everyone know that she wished to wrap Bush in her "lasso of truth."
I've mentioned before that I'm a big fan of Chris Potter's "You Had to Ask" column in City Paper. In the latest installment, a couple asks (actually, I guess they had to ask) about local town names like "Freedom, Liberty, Prosperity, Unity and Economy" which (according to them) have a "distinctly Orwellian nature. Was this some wry irony by Frick and Carnegie? Or a 19th-century attempt at branding?"
Potter's answer was right on, as far as I know, until he got to "Liberty," which as Tube City Online readers know, is a suburb of Our Fair City:
Liberty is a more complicated case. As you've no doubt noticed, Pittsburgh has both an East and West Liberty, and Allegheny County also boasts a Liberty Township. But you've probably also noticed that no one in the county seems much freer as a result. What gives?
Originally, "liberties" were undeveloped areas on the outskirts of town. Since nobody really owned or used them, anybody could turn their cattle loose for grazing. (Imagine an 18th-century Point State Park, except with a slightly smaller chance of stepping in something nasty when you aren't looking.) Eventually, though, the thieving capitalists came along, as they always do. The land was surveyed and sold off, and places like East Liberty became home to numerous mansions.
(A) new animated video released on the Web site of Levdansky's Republican challenger Brad Grantz ... portrays the 39th Legislative District incumbent as a mustachioed pig. To the strains of Stevie Ray Vaughan's rendition of "Taxman," www.votegrantz.com shows how "Lil' Davey" drives recklessly to Harrisburg, has conversations about increasing taxes with the governor, and votes accordingly.
When the camera crew showed up, we wondered why they were all driving Hummers. Our agent assured us it was a Greenpeace commercial and they paid TWICE our hourly steak rate. Little did we know we were being tricked into this vicious campaign attack ad. (Wolfpacks for Truth)
Blondie, wife: The only thing I hate --- HATE --- more than the eating is the sleeping. I've been reading some things online and I think you have undiagnosed clinical depression. Listen, just because you're asleep, it doesn't mean that life stops. You can take your naps on the couch, you can sleep in a hammock, you can oversleep before rushing off to work. But I have news for you, Dagwood: the world is still here. And you have to face it just like everyone else.
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