This has nothing to do with the Mon-Yough area, the Steelers or any of the crappy half-baked themes ... er, fine, fine, quality content ... that have always been hallmarks of the Tube City Almanac.
And I have absolutely no intention of turning this into a pop culture website, because there are already many fine, fine quality pages ... er, I mean crappy, half-baked blogs ... that write too much about pop culture, or what passes for it.
On the other hand, I was a TV critic for a brief time (I think it was like 10 minutes), so I'm obviously just as shallow as anyone else.
Anyway, I have just finished watching what are probably the last four episodes of "Arrested Development" to air on the Fox Television Network (like David Letterman, I still want to giggle when I say that), and I think it may be some time before my pants dry out.
Fox, showing its usual support for any show that requires more brain power than "The World's Wildest Police Chases XIV," dumped the episodes on tonight with virtually no advertising or promotion. I only realized they were airing when I saw the TV listings in tonight's Daily News, and made it home just in time to see them. They might have been the funniest 88 minutes of current television I've seen in five, maybe 10 years.
I'm not going to repeat the jokes to you, because "Arrested Development" is definitely an acquired taste, and it took me several months to acquire it ... and if you haven't been watching the show, the jokes wouldn't make much sense.
Most of the jokes on "Arrested Development" weren't snappy one-liners. They were driven by characters and dialogue. (And frankly, "Arrested Development" might have become a little bit too self-referential over the past few months --- catering to its hard-core fan base. But for the fans, that has made the jokes all the sharper, and the acting has been superb, as usual.)
During the show, Fox ran promos for some of its new fine, fine quality shows, some of which will be filling the spots on the schedule that "Arrested Development" aired in. (I say "spots," because this show has moved more times than Mayflower. Is it any wonder that it couldn't find an audience? You needed a subscription to TV Week, an astrolabe and a Sherpa guide just to find it.)
One of the new Fox comedies is about a college graduate who moves back in with his parents. In hilarious scenes from hilarious upcoming episodes, he finds his best friend dating his aunt! He walks in on his parents when they're having sex! Ha ha ha ha ha! Can't you feel the hilarity already?
Me neither.
Another new Fox sitcom is about a young man and his wacky friends working for a wacky airline! Wacky, wacky, wacky! The guy who played Bookman, the library cop on "Seinfeld," also stars!
I smell "Emmy"! Or, possibly, "cancelled in a month!" It's hard to tell; I'm not quite over the flu yet.
You may have not have liked "Arrested Development," and that's fine. But years from now, people are going to look back on this little show like they look back on other relatively shortlived cult TV shows --- "WKRP in Cincinnati," for instance --- and say, "wait a minute ... they canceled this, and kept 'Everybody Loves Raymond' and 'According to Jim' on for years?"
Yes, yes, they did. Of course, "Everybody Loves Raymond" attracted millions of viewers every week. I'll bet that millions of people every week also enjoy biting their own toenails off. I'm not one of them.
Seriously ... "Everybody Loves Raymond," people?
Sure, "Arrested Development" may wind up on Showtime, but I'm sorry, I still get a pain in my wallet area when I think about paying for TV shows, and those pains shoot from my chest out into my arms when I think about paying for premium channels, so I'll just pass, thanks. (And a report in the Detroit Free Press today indicates that deal has probably fallen through, and that the producers are ready to toss in the towel.)
So long, Bluths. Sadly, we may never learn if the Saddam Hussein on trial right now in Iraq is the real Saddam Hussein ... or the "no scar" Saddam. But at least Jason Bateman has finally learned the truth about his sister, Justine. And I guess that's what really counts, right?
In the wake of the Steelers' victory in the Super Bowl, I took a little break for a few days to catch the flu. On Tuesday morning, I briefly considered checking myself into a funeral home, but I got better.
Someone asked me if he was a "bad Pittsburgher" because he didn't feel any sense of pride or accomplishment in the Steelers' win. Well, since he didn't actually suit up and play on Sunday, I'm thinking: No.
I don't feel any sense of pride or accomplishment, either. I was extremely happy that they won, and I felt very good seeing Dan Rooney and Bill Cowher holding the Vince Lombardi trophy. Given some of the alternatives (the Irsays? Al Davis of the Raiders? Art Modell, formerly of the Browns/Ravens?), I prefer Rooney, and it's about time he had a trophy of his own --- the others belong to the Chief, after all.
I was also happy that the Steelers --- largely free of scandals (and Minnesota Vikings, I'm looking at you) --- won. I mean, would you rather see Jerome Bettis hoisting that trophy or Terrell Owens? Overall, this seems like a settled, well-behaved and decent group of guys, and it's gratifying to see that nice guys do finish first sometimes.
OK, so Roethlisberger's got a wild streak, and Porter leads the league in trash-talking, but basically, the Steelers come off as a team of regular people and seem unusually well-spoken for pro athletes. Ward and Bettis in particular have second careers waiting for them in the media; they're better already than a lot of so-called professional TV journalists.
But pride? Accomplishment? What did I accomplish? I'm happy for the Steelers. Isn't that enough?
Also, do I think it's "great" for the region, as some of the talking heads are arguing? Well, it's not harmful for the city. But I didn't see where the price of a gallon of milk dropped on Monday, nor did my taxes go down. Duquesne City School District is still on the verge of dismemberment. The Homestead High-Level Bridge is still falling down.
And when the Steelers were winning all of those championships in the '70s, it didn't save the steel industry in the Mon Valley. Four Super Bowls didn't keep our family and our neighbors from having to line up for government cheese.
Great for the region? Eh. It's a sugar rush. Once it fades, what do you have? An upset stomach and a headache.
Speaking of the 1970s Steelers, can we stop talking about them now? Thanks. I think the current Steelers would appreciate that, too.
Also, would it kill the Pirates to go .500 this year? I'm not asking for a World Series. Just don't lose more games than you win. Please? Pretty please?
We'll work on the Penguins (who after all, have two Stanley Cups since the last Pirates World Series win) next year.
---
Sunday night, after the game, I took a quick spin through Our Fair City and the suburbs to see what celebrations might be ongoing.
It might have been the first time since ... well, since the last Steelers Super Bowl win ... that there was a traffic jam Downtown on a Sunday night. Lots of people leaning out of car windows or sticking up out of sunroofs, spinning Terrible Towels. And when one Terrible Towel waver met another, of course, they started honking their horns at each other. (Sometimes they even honked the car's horn. Heigh-yo!)
It's been 26 years. How do you put it into perspective? The last time the Steelers won the Super Bowl:
--- U.S. Steel's National Works was coming off one of its best years, having shipped thousands of tons of pipe to Alaska and Texas, where oil speculators were trying to cash in on the energy crisis.
--- Its sister plant, Duquesne Works, was four years away from winning U.S. Steel's "Ironmaster" award for breaking a bunch of production records ... it would close before the ink was dry on the souvenir jackets.
--- Other steelmaking facilities in the city included Fort Pitt Steel Casting in Christy Park and Firth-Sterling in the East End. (Both had about another year to go.)
--- Cox's and Jaison's department stores were still in business Downtown. So were two five-and-10s (Murphy's and Green's), several shoe stores, National Record Mart, Wander Sales, Kelly and Cohen, and several jewelry stores --- off the top of my head (which is an odd place for a jewelry store), Goodman's, Morrow's and Gala's.
--- Downtown also had two functional hotels --- the McKeesport Sheraton and the Penn-McKee.
--- The old 15th Avenue Bridge was still open, and would be for another nine years.
--- Besides the Daily News, Mon-Yough residents were also reading the Pittsburgh Press, the Monongahela Daily Herald, the Irwin Standard-Observer and the Jeannette News-Dispatch. (The Homestead Daily Messenger had abruptly closed a year earlier, while the Jeannette "News-Disgrace" would limp along for another year.)
--- Century III Mall was only a year old. Eastland Mall still boasted Gimbels, Penney's and Woolworth's. (And Wiener World, as Alert Sometime Reader Dan always reminds me.)
What else was different in 1980 that I'm forgetting? Feel free to add your suggestions in the comments below.
You are on an archived page of Tube City Almanac.
Click the banner to return to the front page; or click here to visit Tube City Online.
Published weekdays (usually), except holidays (and when we have something better to do) at McKeesport, Pa., by Tube City Online LLC, P.O. Box 94, McKeesport, Pa. 15134.
Opinions expressed here are those of the individual authors, and do not necessarily represent those of any organization. No warranty is given or implied for the information and opinions contained herein; the reader uses that information at his or her peril.
Except where noted, all contents are copyright © 2003-2008 Tube City Online LLC, a limited-liability company chartered in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania. No content from Tube City Online may be reproduced in whole or part in any digital or print publication without express permission, except that short excerpts may be used with attribution in commentary or for critical purposes.
Tube City Online is edited by Jason Togyer, member National Writers Union, Society of Professional Journalists, American Radio Relay League and National Radio Club.
Also, objects in Tube City Online may be closer than they appear. If Tube City Online is swallowed, seek professional help immediately. Stop use of Tube City Online if condition persists or worsens. Tube City Online is produced in a facility that also includes Peanuts. Do not expose Tube City Online to open flames and keep it out of the reach of children. Do not back up, as severe tire damage may result. Not responsible for lost or stolen articles. Tube City Online is still not a significant source of saturated fats or Minnesota Fats.
